Pausing in the Face of Fear

A mother recently chose life at the abortion center, but she was as determined as anyone I have met to kill her child when I first encountered her. She stopped her car and looked at me, giving me an opportunity to speak. I think she was a little bit lost and was hoping I would direct her. 

I DID direct her…to Jesus rather than the abortion clinic.

Her window opened just the teeniest crack.

“Are you headed to the women’s center?” I asked.

“Yes…is this where it is?”

“We have information that can help you. Would you take it? We have so many resources including a free ultrasound on the RV parked just down the street.”

She shook her head and didn’t open the window any further.

“I CANNOT have this baby.”

I saw the tiniest tear creep out of the corner of one eye.

“You really don’t want to abort, do you? Do you know how far along you are?”

“I think eleven weeks.”

I opened my booklet and showed her the photo of an 11-week baby in the womb. “By now your baby has a heart beat, brain waves, ten fingers and ten toes, unique finger prints, every organ in place. What is your situation that makes you feel you have to abort?”

The window rolled down a crack further.

“I can’t have this baby. I can barely provide for the one I have.”

“Do you love that child at home?”

She nodded.

“Would you send that child back? Listen, I don’t know the specifics of what you face, but I know we can help. For example, we provide baby showers that give up to two years of the clothes and supplies your baby will need. We have so many other resources we can point you to. Please, take my booklet. My name and number are on it so you can contact me at any time, no matter what you decide.”

The window rolled down a little more. She reached for the booklet. I slipped it in to her.

“Do you know God?”

Now the tears began to cascade.

“What would He have you do?” I asked.

She cried out as though in pain, and slammed her fist down in a torrent of tears. Her shoulders shook with her cries. I think she knew exactly what Jesus would have her do…and abortion was not it.

“Oh honey,” I said, “would you consider coming on the RV and let’s talk about how we can help you?”

She lifted her head and looked down the street at our Cities4Life team stretched along the sidewalk.

“Are those protesters? I don’t want them to pressure me. They cannot talk to me at all!”

“They are with me. They are not protesters, they are offering hope and help. But they won’t talk to you.”

Honestly, I didn’t know how I could guarantee that. They are a friendly, loving group. They often offer help and encouragement to the moms who approach us. How could I telegraph to them this mom didn’t want them to come near?

“Drive down and park behind the RV,” I said. “I’ll meet you there.”

She nodded, rolled the window back up, and drove down the street. As I jogged behind her, I prayed she did not turn instead into the abortion center. She didn’t. She parked behind the RV. Our team, sensing the situation, didn’t speak to her. They smiled, but then continued reaching out to other moms entering the center. I am convinced the Holy Spirit guided all of them in that perfect response.

I walked the woman (who I will call Sarah) into the RV where the HELP Pregnancy Center sonographer, Kelly, met us. Kelly set up for the ultrasound while I talked with Sarah about her situation. As she listed her concerns, I wrote each one down. I then explained how we could help in each area. A friend who was meeting her at the abortion center arrived. That friend was visibly pregnant. In fact, she told us she had come to abort her baby just a few months ago at this very place. In the end, she changed her mind but didn’t tell any of us on the sidewalk. 

“I am so glad I didn’t abort,” she said.

I offered her the same resources we now offered Sarah. Then we went to see Sarah’s baby on the mobile ultrasound. When the baby’s image appeared on the screen, Sarah’s mouth fell open and she cried out in a voice filled with wonder. “I thought it was just a clump of cells! Oh my. This is really real. Oh my.”

She continued to gasp in shock and delight as the little baby moved and stretched. I knew at that point there was little doubt the baby was safe now. His mama had seen him for what he was — her child. A precious tiny vulnerable human whom God had perfectly designed Sarah to protect.

When I walked her to her car, she stopped before getting in. “Thank you so much. I feel so much better. And I feel humbled. I learned that I should not be in such a rush. I need to think more before I take action.”

“You were in a crisis and let fear take over,” I said.

“Yes.”

“Fear is a nasty liar. A life and death decision should never be made on the basis of fear. Trust God to guide you instead.”

*****

Psalm 34:4

I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.

*****