Arming Yourself

As you all know, I love dogs. But I hate being attacked by dogs. It is not the dog's fault. It is the stupid owners who don't train their dogs, control their dogs, and have the common sense to walk their dogs outside on leash. It is the irresponsible owners who don't understand that even if their dog is friendly, my dog might not want you in her face. All you yoyo dog owners out there, I am talking to you. I carry mace and I will use it. It is a good thing I had it yesterday.

This is a tutorial on what to do in a dog attack. I don't get attacked any more frequently, on average, than anyone else. However, because I am a runner, walker, and biker, I am outside and available to canine clashes more than the average human target. So I know of what I speaketh. I have never been bitten, and I believe that is for two reasons: #1. I speak loudly and carry a big stick, and #2. I have a very powerful guardian angel.

SO, now for the tutorial. Most dogs attacking are pets, however ill trained and ill mannered. Therefore, most of them understand the words, "No", "Go Home", and "I'm Armed and will shoot". The first line of defense in a dog attack is to turn to face the idiot owner's dog, and in your most threatening deep voice yell, "NO!!!! GO HOME!!!" In 3 out of 5 cases, this alone will work. The absolute biggest no-no is to run. When you run from a predator, you become prey. Even well trained dogs can sometimes not resist the primal urge to run down prey. So don't run. If there is a tree right there and you are sure you can get up it, that is not a bad idea. But do not try to outrun a dog. Even a 3 legged dog can outrun a human. You should not stare down a dog. That also makes them nutty. It is a challenge and dogs with 3,000 pounds of jaw bite pressure should not be challenged.

Secondly, if the dog is still persistent, has hackles raised, is showing teeth or growling, you had better hope and pray you remembered your little can of mace. You are doing humanity a service if you mace that dog BUT GOOD. It is likely he will remember it and think twice about attacking anyone again. I discovered yesterday that Dick's Sporting Goods sells mace. I bought 3 cans.

Yesterday, the stocky muscled missile armed with teeth came sprinting down the street after my dogs and me. The owner, in curlers and bathrobe, stood in the yard. She had violated two tenets of dog ownership right off the bat. #1. She was a nincompoop, thinking it just fine to let an aggressive dog go poop in her yard off leash, #2. Who needs a #2 when you have a #1? I did all the things outlined in the tutorial. I told the dog no, go home, in my deepest growliest voice. That did make the dog pause as it reached us. Then I maced him. He went racing home to his stupid owner. It is really the owner I wanted to mace, but I think there may be laws against that.

Unfortunately, there is no law against stupid.

Now, to the Godly message in all of this. I know,I don't usually throw out words like stupid. I really shouldn't use such words but I am at a loss as to how else to get my point across. Here is what I think God was telling me: Be prepared.

If I had not had the mace, that dog was intent on attack. Usually I can find a stick or something if I don't have my mace, but there was nothing like that in sight. I don't always bring my mace, but now I will. The Bible speaks often of being prepared. We don't like to think of our neighborhood streets as being dangerous, but as long as there is sin in the world and, forgive me Lord, stupid dog owners, we had best acknowledge that fact, and be prepared for battle.

The Bible warns that there is an ongoing battle for our soul. If we pretend that battle isn't real, and are not prepared for it, we will be attacked, and we will have no defense. Our 'spiritual can of mace' is the Word of God and His spirit within us. We are supposed to arm ourselves by delving deeply into His message, and never ever leaving home without it.

2 Samuel 22:33
It is God who arms me with strength
and keeps my way secure.






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