I went kayaking right after getting a bone density scan. That was the absolute least invasive medical procedure I have had to have in a long time! It doesn't hurt AT ALL. The oncologist wanted to see how much calcium had leeched from my bones over the years since I already have borderline bone mass and the cancer drug will eat my bones even more. If only everything I faced was so painless....
My plastic surgeon tells me the operation Friday will very likely NOT be my last one. After radiation, the implant for mastectomy breast reconstruction tends to shrink and harden, and many women have to have a third surgery to correct the "capsular contractions". I am NOT LOVING this process.
The radiologist who was on-call for my vacationing doctor went to a lot of trouble to search for some articles that answered my worried questions. He emailed me the research report. The statistics are not encouraging. With the type of reconstruction I have and the surgery tomorrow (which I thought would be the last one), the majority of women who have radiation after the reconstruction (like me) will end up with another surgery to fix the effects of radiation. If I wait and have the reconstruction surgery after radiation, the reconstruction I have is often unsuccessful or with unsatisfactory results due to the condition of the radiated skin. There is no good option open to me, except prayer.
This is never ending! I had no idea when I started this journey how much struggle and impossible decisions would have to be made. I have no choice at this point, being half-way through the process. So I spent a lot of time talking to God. Please Lord, let me defy the odds and have no complications and let this be the last surgery I will need. I would calm during my chats with Him, and especially when I focused on praying for others, but it was a constant battle to keep my mind stayed on God, rather than my troubled thoughts.
What I am going through is difficult, but we all face troubling issues in life. None of us know what we will face when we crawl out of the womb. If we did, we would all crawl right back in. We are often faced with impossible choices, none of which seem perfect or even pleasant. None of us are guaranteed an easy go of it. Truthfully, the Bible says all of us are guaranteed times of struggle.
How are we to survive then? Or even better, how do we thrive in the midst of this guaranteed pain and suffering? Is kayaking all day every day the only way to find peace? (It works for me to a point...and then my arms give out.)
“Peace be with you.” (John 20:19) The promise and hope in the words of the risen Christ are the only peace that will confront and vanquish the terrors of the Enemy.
Fortunately, the lake and kayak worked their magic. My pulse and blood pressure returned to a normal range following the peaceful emptying of my mind before God in the glory of His creation.
Besides, I got two pieces of good news. The baby of one of the mamas I work with who had been in the Neonatal ICU for ten days IS HOME!!!!! Next, the mama who chose life Monday but is still wavering texted me. Her baby is still safe in her womb, and she sounds like she is leaning towards letting him remain there.
So, prayer warriors -- big list for you. Please....
1. Pray surgery Friday goes well with no complications
2. Pray radiation does not damage my implant and I miraculously need no more operations.
3. Praise God for the adorable baby boy given a second lease on life!
4. Pray the wavering mama chooses life, and rededicates her life to God.
Oh! One other really joyful news! My audiobook producers whom I adore have asked to do Gidget- The Horse Formerly Known as Witch as an audiobook! I am thrilled as Dorothy Deavers Moore and Rick Moore are on-fire Christians with an incredible talent as well. (If you sign up for my mailing list on the upper right side of this blog page, you will be in the running for one of ten free new audio-book giveaways when they are completed. Go ahead. Nothing to lose and everything to gain!)
So don't feel bad for me. I am blessed. Everyone is who has God on their side. Troubles will not cease, but God does provide tranquil water in the midst of this troubled world. Its name is Jesus.
*****
James 1:12
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he
has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has
promised to those who love him.
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is
faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but
with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may
be able to endure it.