Transformational Love

I face this every year....I coordinate the ski trips for our homeschoolers in our area, and have to make the decision the night before we go if the roads will be safe, and if the weather will be good for skiing. Invariably, it is a judgment call, and is never easy to make. I certainly would not want to say it is safe to go, and then have someone in our group get in an accident because the roads were indeed NOT safe, nor do I want to have our group show up to miserable skiing conditions. If it's slushy snow, the little ones who are beginners fall down, and are soaking wet within minutes, and miserable. I must consider many factors and base my decision on what is most beneficial to the most people.

We are slated to go Tuesday, but there has been a warming trend, so no snowmaking on the mountain, and it is supposed to rain on top of it. These are the times when I really hate being in charge. I pondered this while listening to a series of Christian broadcasts by Larry Crabb, about relationships. He is so insightful and I am learning wonderful Biblical truths. (Believe it or not, this relates to my skiing dilemma.) One thing he said applies to so many areas of life, and could transform every human relationship if everyone abided by it. He said, "We should be profoundly committed to the well being of another rather than ourselves."  

Profoundly committed to the well-being of others.

The root of all human relationship struggle is selfishness. We love and respect others as long as they meet our needs. When they falter and our needs aren't met, we grow angry with them, and tension escalates. Being in charge of a large group helps me to understand this on a different level. The needs of everyone else rather than my own is paramount, or I could be responsible for widespread disaster and unhappiness. It is a burden, but I shoulder it because I want to give my daughter and her friends the opportunity to ski at the group rate. Nonetheless, despite all my volunteer efforts and headache of running the group, I get constant challenges and complaints because the way I run the group doesn't meet certain people's needs. This has been true of every group I have ever run, and I have run many. (And yes...I do wonder sometimes why I bother given the heartache I know will ensue.)

As soon as any rules or restrictions or guidelines are placed by the group leader, some members of the group become ruffled because all their precious needs aren't met. There have been terrible episodes of nasty attacks and back stabbing of the very person (me) who made it possible for them to have whatever great group activity is being provided. Those people seem to believe that their needs outweigh the needs of others and they are justified in their defiance and undermining.

It is also very true in marriage and any other committed relationship. If we are truly committed to others' well being, and subjugate our own needs and desires to the welfare of others, we are most Christ-like, and as a result, transformational. What is best for others may well conflict with what I want, but if I am committed to being more like Christ, I must do what is best for them. Profoundly committed to what is best for them.

That's what I want to be.

So I am watching the weather, and praying, and by tonight, have to decide what is in the best interests of everyone. To ski, or not to ski, that is the question. (If we ski, expect no blog on Wednesday as I will be back home too late, and much too exhausted.) I am profoundly committed to making the choice that brings the most benefit to all involved.
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John 15:13 

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.

1 John 4:8 

Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.

1 John 3:18

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

Philippians 2:3-10 

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.

1 John 4:16 

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.

Matthew 20:26-28 

It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”