Petals Falling Away

It is a rainy morning. Matt heads back today to finish out his undergraduate career. As I was looking for an artwork for today's blog, I thought this picture looks just like how I feel. Putting on a sunny face but really, feeling droopy with petals slowly drifting off.

I guess we all feel that way sometimes, wanting to lift a perfect and joyful blooming visage to the world, but not quite having all it takes to do so. I also like how the picture shows that there are a bunch of other sad sunflowers, some in even worse shape propping each other up. They can't prevent the petals from falling, or browning, but they can help the tender stalk remain up right, at least for a while. I am quite sure it is not what I was consciously thinking when I painted the picture, but I am also sure God knew someday I would need to look at it and find comfort.

I love sunflowers. Once, when Asherel was still very young and I was pulling her in a little cart behind my bicycle, we spotted a whole stand of sunflowers in a field. It was a vacant field, and the sunflowers were wild- maybe leftovers from some ancient farmer. I went and dug a few stalks, roots and all, and piled them in the cart beside Asherel. We then biked home, with my baby surrounded by 5 foot tall sunflowers waving in the wind. Lots of people honked and waved. It is not every day you see sunflowers out for a bikeride.

So rain and the gloom of worries may be sitting beside me, but I have visions of biking sunflowers dancing in my head. Even if petals are flying off, it is a glorious ride.

Psalm 30:11
You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy