Singing Another's Song

We head for the hills today. While it is supposed to hit 60 degrees, there is still snow on the mountain and we are doomed... er,.... excited to know we will indeed finally be able to snow board. This is particularly thrilling for me as yesterday my toenail fell off from the severe trauma of a few months back, so that foot is a little tender anyway. I am hoping the pain of that in a snowboard boot will take my mind off the broken hip and dislocated shoulder sure to follow this adventure.

But first, we are stopping at an outlet mall. The kids are very excited about snowboarding, but Matt in particular, in preparation for law school, loves shopping at outlet stores. He intends to be if not the best law student, at least the best dressed law student. He loves finding $2000 shirts for $10, and seems to have a knack for doing so. So we will spend the afternoon, wandering stores, without a toenail. (The better writers in the group are no doubt laughing and saying "Of course stores don't have toenails," but I must admit I am unsure how to phrase this so it is clear that it is me, not the store that doesn't have a toenail.)

Please do not tell my kids , but this one is for them. I really have very little desire to snowboard (can you tell?) and even shopping has lost its allure for me. We are currently booked in a very low cost and I fear moldy hotel, but it is just for one night. This is an offering of love to the children that I can never hold as tightly or as closely as I wish or they would suffocate.

Sometimes, despite your own taste in music, you listen to someone else's favorite song. Every parent out there knows that at times, you must subject yourself to the musical whims of your progeny just because you love them. You grab any connection to them you can as they blow up the balloon of life and start to float away from you.

And the strangest thing is, I come to love it all.... not for the intrinsic love of the activity itself, or the loud song itself, but for the joy of doing it with the people that I love so much. I remember once when I asked Arvo if he wanted to go to the playground with us, he told me, no, I could go, because I loved it so much. I stood there stunned.
"You think I love pushing swings, chasing toddlers, and riding dinosaur see saws?"
"You seem to, " he told me.
I am here to admit right now that I do not love pushing swings or riding dinosaur see saws.... but what I do love is seeing the joy in my child's face because she loves it. (well, used to... she is 12 now and would not be caught dead on a dinosaur see saw)

And this I realize is how we are to pursue God. Not to bargain for all the good things He will bring us that will make our lives fun and easy.... but to try to discern what He desires, and find joy in fulfilling that. I suspect that if I cannot do that, I really don't know what it means to love God, or anyone for that matter.

So, probably no blog post tomorrow. I will be off singing my children's songs......

Deuteronomy 30:20
and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life