True Believers

My mother always said, if you wait long enough, everything you own will come back in style. My drawer full of every size, style, material, and color of fanny packs will now be the most coveted fashion accessory of the year. Haute couture runways throughout the fashion world are parading tall sleek models sporting FANNY PACKS!!!!!
I kid you not! And listen to what the reporters of the Wall Street Journal are saying about these staples of my wardrobe:

"Diane von Furstenberg, creative director Yvan Mispelaere- His $325 DVF belted satchels hitting stores this month aren't actually called fanny packs, of course. Mr. Mispelaere refers to them as "hands-free bags"—a name, he says, that helps convey "a functional shape, but with a touch of glamour, a touch of luxury and a touch of seriousness."

"accessory that has been decidedly démodé for at least two decades: the fanny pack. "

"Korean-American handbag designer Sang A Im-Propp, who sells an alligator version for $1,995, calls hers a "belt bag." The term "fanny pack," she says, "is just eww, so cheesy, so tacky, so horrible." Celebrities, increasingly keen to emphasize lower-body curves, have been early adopters. Singer Rihanna was captured by paparazzi while wearing a Louis Vuitton fanny pack on a trip to London in late 2009. Ciara, in her "Gimmie Dat" video, pairs stripper heels and a leather bustier with a giant red fanny pack that spells the word "FLY." Despite the lampooning, the usefulness of the item has never eluded true believers. "

So that is what I am!!! I am a "true believer". I have been one of those "decidedly demode" laughed at "touristy types" that have worn fanny packs for two decades.... Now finally, finally the world has figured out fanny packs are incredibly practical and comfortable. I just cannot wait to start parading out in my fanny packs again. My lovely black embroidered velvet one for dress occasions, my 30 gallon rip stop nylon one for serious tourism, my small and convenient biking/skiing one with water bottle holders.....OH life is worth living again!!!!

You cannot imagine the abuse that has been heaped upon me by so-called "loved ones" because of my fanny pack fetish. At last, it is I in my fanny pack that will be featured on the cover of Vogue, the prescient wise and ever so glamorous one. I see that the only mistake I made was in not properly naming this accessory. If only I had thought to call it a "hands free" bag.... I would never have had to suffer through purses.

Yesterday, before I had received this life-changing news, my own lovely purse that Asherel made for me out of duct tape must have had a premonition. This is a TRUE story. I was at the phone store dealing with my phone exorcism (yesterday's post for those of you who think I am making this up), when all of a sudden, the strap of my purse snapped off. I grabbed the purse and had to carry it without a strap until Asherel could repair it. My own purse was giving me a message. Hands free bags- the wave of the future!

I cannot understand why my future daughter in law has not responded to my email asking her what color she wants my mother of the groom fanny pack to be. And why did my son see this news about the fanny pack, send me the link with only one word in his email: " Great." I think perhaps these beloved ones are not true believers.

Surprisingly, the Bible does discuss fanny packs... though of course back in those days they weren't called fanny packs, or even hands free packs.  They were called "purses that will not wear out." They were used as a symbol of what we should be clothing ourselves with. We should be thinking less of fashion,  and more of what covers us with eternal beauty. That is of course Jesus Himself, who hands us fanny packs that will never go out of style.

Luke 12:23
Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will never fail, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.



Psalm 65:12
The grasslands of the wilderness overflow; the hills are clothed with gladness.





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"Nothing is impossible with God"