Finding and Losing

I awoke to snow this morning. Steady thick snow is falling right now. It is the first snow I have seen in a year so it is magical, beautiful, peaceful. It may ruin our plans today to go skiing. I am from NC. I am used to clear, safe streets to drive on to the ski mountain where not a drop of real snow lies. On the mountain, manmade icy granules pass as snow. But the roads are safe driving to and from, usually in balmy 50 degree weather.

This real snow poses a definite problem. I will have to drive on snowy roads to reach the ski mountain. Funny how the goal and the dilemma are presented by the same factor. Snow is both the desired haven and the treacherous liability. For all of you who have read my new book, you know that I am not a great snow driver, which led to the title story, and the day I met God driving a tow truck. So I don't want to drive in the snow, but I do want to ski in it. And it is the only time my brother will be able to ski with us.

We had had an extended discussion yesterday about how to construct our half day on the mountain. It is the cheaper night skiing rate/time, which goes from 4-9.
"But I am not a night person,John," I had warned, "And honestly, 4 hours of skiing is usually about all I can take."
"Let me explain how Jenny and I go skiing," said John, "We ski maybe 3 runs, then we go have 3 beers, then we ski another run or two and call it a night. We will be out of there by 8."
"Got it, I'll be the designated driver."
Normally when I ski, on the other hand, I don't take a break unless absolute necessity compels me to to. Once I start skiing, only exhaustion or a bursting bladder will induce me to come off the mountain. And I certainly would not mix one drop of alcohol with my already precarious skill level. I suspect John's ski style and mine are doomed to clash.

But now, we may not get to go unless the snow stops falling, because I won't drive on snowy roads. It reminds me of Paul's dilemma in following Jesus. He longs desperately to be with Jesus, in heaven, to adopt his new sonship and relationship and eternal joy with the heavenly Father. However, that same Father has for now called Paul to remain on earth, facing struggle, shipwreck, disease, persecution, torture, and prison. Fun fun fun! The goal is so tantalizing, but the way to reach it proscribed by the goal itself is filled with trauma and trial. The snow calls me, but has laced the path with its essence...snow....snow that often lies atop black ice where I can so easily lose my way.

Matthew 16:25
For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.








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