Thursday, February 16, 2012

We are always being watched






I friended someone on facebook because she requested it. I didn't know her, but I assumed she had read my book, and I can always use friends. She wrote to me and told me that I had once made a huge impact on her life, and she wanted to share it with me. In fact, she wrote a blog post about it. Again, I supposed something in one of my books had touched her. I read her blog post. She had known me but a brief time when she was a teen and I was a young mother. Something I had done had stayed with her all these years, and she had finally tracked me down via facebook. She wanted to find me and tell me how I had impacted her life.

Most of us will never know the ripples we leave in our wake. But we all leave ripples. We are always watched, and someone always is noticing something. Julie caught me at a moment in my life when I did it right. I assure you, that was not common.

This is really worth reading, not only because it paints me in a favorable light (yes!) but because she is a gifted writer who not only overcame dyslexia, but soared. With her permission, I have posted it in its entirety below. It is long, but you will be blessed if you read it. It is the beautiful portrait of gratitude from a young lady who clearly sees that we never know how we might be changing someone's life. Live always with that in mind.

imnooliviawalton
An Ocean of Friends
February 15, 2012 ·

I am not a surfer girl, but the analogy of the ocean and of waves to friendship was too good to pass up, and I think I can pull this one off even though I’ve never put my Gidget on and surfed with Moon Doggy.

Friends are like ocean waves, each one makes an impact on the beach, each wave that rolls in changes the beach, some deposit treasures like sea glass or beautiful shells, others shift the sand but leaves it unharmed. Since I joined Facebook a few years ago, I have been blessed enough to have some of those waves come back to visit, and even now they’re leaving their marks on my heart, once again some have deposited treasure and I wonder what I did without them all these years. I have been doubly blessed to meet “waves” that are family members I’ve never had the chance to meet before, and some family members I knew but never had the opportunity to really love and know, these are precious waves that linger like a tidal pool and hold amazing treasures from the ocean of friendship.

On the ocean, once in a very great while, off the coast of South Africa, Hawaii, or Australia there comes a wave that calls the surfers with its irresistible possibilities. These waves often impact the shore in a greater way, but even before they wash ashore they offer so much of themselves. They tend to be a wonder to behold, they are a glassy, beautiful blue-green wave the height of which is unlike any other wave. Sure there are big waves before, during and after a storm but they don’t bring beauty they scar the shore, they sweep away tons of sand and leave debris and death in their wake, those are not the waves I’m referring to. These are the waves you see in movies where the surfers ride in their curl, hand outstretched to touch the glass-like surface. These are the waves you see in photos, in calendars, and books, they’re beautiful, graceful and welcome. These waves are the ones that leave the kind of impact on your life you wish you could encounter again and again, but it’s the scarcity of them that makes them special.

The moment I joined Facebook I started looking for those waves that created just such a splash in my life (was the splash thing too much? I kinda like it). Unfortunately, there is really no way to tell them what kind of impact they had on me, they changed my life the minute they started cresting towards me, they left a myriad of treasures on the shores of my heart, they changed the surface of my heart, my thoughts, my future in ways I cannot articulate. I love words, they’re so amazing, but I cannot find words to sum up their impact. To be very honest they are moms, I babysat for their children, they welcomed me into their homes and talked to me like I was a friend. They shared different parenting styles with me, tricks and tips for motherhood, homemaking, and marriage. I loved them far more dearly than I could tell them.

Then, life happened, I went to college, met my husband, moved away, had my children, all the while their impact was a daily reminder of those wonders of nature. Years went by, their children grew, went to college, married, and had children, those little ones whose diapers I changed, the ones I took walks with while holding their tiny hands, we played, we giggled, then they grew up and I never knew them again…whats more I missed their mothers. Not in a way I miss my mother, but I missed them deep in a place in my heart that held the treasures they freely gave to me.

One by one I found them, a couple I found through other friends, a couple I had to diligently search for, those waves I watched and wondered at and learned from came back into my life. I cannot say how excited I was, how much I long to pour my heart out to them, to tell them how often I thought of them. One mom left one of many marks on my heart because we shared the experience of the loss of a pregnancy, I remembered the grace she showed even in her sorrow, I remembered how she went directly to our Savior, her example became the Lighthouse that helped me through that time in my life. I think of another one of my waves each week when I clean out my fridge the night before garbage pick-up. You may think that’s silly but she imparted a sense of organization and though I am not a super organized person, her habit stayed with me. This same wave had impeccable taste in home decoration, I remember a picture she had on her sun porch of a beach chair on the sand overlooking a peaceful, placid ocean, I’ve thought of that image often when I’ve had sleepless nights, it calms me.

Another one of these wonders was a dear friend, she walked with me, invited me down to try cranberry sauce for the first time, she answered my questions no matter how silly or how big, she gave me wise, Biblically based advice. She was disappointed with me when I didn’t live up to my potential (which wasn’t a bad thing, she wanted to see me do and be my best, she loved me enough to know what I could do), and was excited with me when I achieved a goal. I remember her every time I think of my wedding, I remembered her when I potty-trained my boys (her child was one of the first ones I babysat for who was in the midst of potty-training). More than all that I think of how she continued her education as an adult so she could do what she longed to do, I’ve decided to pursue further education when my boys grow up, and I feel fortified knowing she succeed so admirably.

The final wonder was a wave that rolled in far too briefly, she rolled in not long after I received my diagnosis of dyslexia, she encouraged me. She, her husband and I would sit in their livingroom (I can picture it so clearly even now) surrounded with her original art work gracing the walls of her home, we’d talk about the Lord, life and so much more. She and her husband were quite possibly the most intelligent people I’d ever met and yet they never made this learning disabled, teen-aged girl feel stupid, I never felt lesser around them. We had many discussions and they always seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say…this really amazed me! I remember one time she had to ask me about something her son told her about that confused and concerned her, and though it was just a silly incident involving a difference of terminology I remember how much I admired the fact that though she was nervous to discuss this she did it anyway, she did it lovingly and without offending me, I thought I could never be that strong and gracious at the same time, but I wanted to be like her.

I know I would not be the same person without them, I wish I could have been able to glean more from their treasure trove of knowledge and love. Each one of these women are Godly wives and biblical mothers, women I want nothing more than to emulate. On my Facebook page I say my daily goal is to honor God and be a blessing to others, though they never said this exact phrase to me, I saw/see this in them. They were a blessing to me, but how can I tell them how much of a blessing when they haven’t actually finished being a blessing to me? I’m not sure I’ve been this frustrated with my abilities, or lack thereof in a very long time!

I guess the best I can do is to finish this way Gini, Cindy, Janet and Vicky “I thank my God upon every remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine making request for you all with joy for your fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now.” Philippians 1:3-5

(You can follow Julie's wonderful blog at http://imnooliviawalton.wordpress.com/)



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2 comments:

  1. She who plants may not see the harvest, but it is important to plant. Blessed is she who plants AND sees the harvest.

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